Thursday, April 16, 2009

NaPoWriMo Day 16: Allure, Vivid, and Perch for 3WW

We were out hunting,
the woods all golden,

two parents and four kids
walking along a skidder trail.

I spied a bird
high on his perch,

a vivid speck against the blue.
The allure too much,

my brother tried to shoot it.
The bullet flew off to another planet.

I laughed. He turned red.
“You do it, then,” he said.

I took the gun,
spread my legs to balance,

aimed up to heaven,
and pulled the trigger.

That bird fell
right at my feet,

fat and warm.

The leaves
crunched like remorse

as we quietly made our way
back out of the woods.


Anonymous said...

Ahhh!!!! I'm so sorry. Isn't it weird how brothers had the power to make us raise to the challenge but the victory wasn't as sweet as we were led to believe?

pia said...

I can see why you didn't want to remember that. Very vivid

Anonymous said...

"The leaves / crunched like remorse" is a powerful sound and visual image.

SweetTalkingGuy said...

Phew, but you'd have thought that the sound of the first shot would have frightenrd the bird away.

ThomG said...

You know, I hunt, but the first (and only) time I killed a songbird with my BB gun, I was so remorseful. I stick with wild game now - and always eat what I shoot. (Good thing I'm not on the frontier, or else I would have starved by now anyway.)

Erin Davis said...

Powerful and heartbreaking.

MichaelO said...

Very much an unforgettable memory. You summarized the mixed emotions quite well.

Liz at Yips and Howls said...

The vivid pictures you paint make this so poignant.

Pam said...

Leaves crunching like remorse-- wonderful line.

susan said...

The leaves/crunched like remorse

I was stunned. Very effective line and image.

Beloved Dreamer said...

Excellent poem and use of prompt words. Well done.

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