3WW December 19, 2007
clumsy fire overlooked
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
The Cleaning Girl
She smelled of sweat
and unwashed hair.
Stains decorated the front
of her too-small T-shirt.
I’d watch her carry
her cleaning supplies
toward her motel rooms,
Her shoulders rounded
her clumsy feet pigeon-toed.
Later, I’d check her work
to see what she had overlooked.
Sometimes, it was an extra
roll of toilet paper,
sometimes the dust
on the TV,
often, soap or towels.
At the end of the day
she’d shuffle back
to the storage room
with a sour look
on her face,
the same look
I knew
she’d make
when I’d have
to fire her.
9 comments:
I felt bad for her in the beginning... and even still a little in the end. I'd like to hear her side of the story.
An approaching inevitability, desired by neither party. You end up with sympathy for both. Nicely illustrated.
excellent.. you took the other "fire" route,, and i soooo love it!!!!
very nice...the two sided story is a nifty take on the prompt...
I feel more sad for the girl.
Rose
xo
a well written albeit very sad story. i think we all know this girl, and i think many of us have been in your position. i hope you kept her through the holidays - if that was the season...
I really liked the way you ended it!
amnesia
Interesting poem, good that you justified why she was fired whilst describing her expressions and actions.
i really liked your story..i could see everything...poor thing...life is a hard reality
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